Thursday, September 20, 2012

A Dream in Disguise

I'm a terrible singer.

Ask my nieces who, upon hearing my "Rock Band" rendition of Taylor Swift, offered me a permanent seat at the drum set. Ask my daughter who yells from the back seat every time I chime in with the radio, "No, Mommy, don't sing!"

Seriously, I'm awful. Arguably the worst. Ever.

Still, I always wanted to be a singer despite the full knowledge that I am totally and completely tone deaf. Even the best of singing coaches would not have improved the nails-on-a-chalkboard sound resonating from my vocal chords. Even so, I signed up for chorus and sang off key in the back row of the alto section all through junior high and high school. I performed for screaming fans of stuffed animals with my hair brush microphone and gave acceptance speeches for imaginary Grammy awards. But deep down I always knew I would have to find a different dream.

Oh, how I envied the golden voices of Celine Dion and Whitney Houston. To have a voice that carries people to another world and to share it with a passion that tugs at the heartstrings of the deepest cynics is to truly be blessed with a gift. What I would have given for their gift to be my gift! But deep down I always knew I would have to make a different wish.

Even though I always accepted the reality of my limitations, I still felt that once-in-a-while sting in my heart when I witnessed a moving vocal performance or caught the sound of my own warbling in my ear at church. How I wish for a beautiful voice…

In all those years, it never occurred to me that my wish might come true through a different path; that maybe I was pursuing the right dream in the wrong way.

Eighteen months ago, I launched a blog in a desperate attempt to reclaim my identity and have something, anything to call my own after almost a year as a stay-at-home mom without any personal outlets. So I opened a blank page and I started to write.

And wouldn't ya know it? It turns out I do have a beautiful voice.

If you have a dream that hasn’t come true, step back and look around. Maybe it has and you just can't see it from where you're standing. Maybe you're pursuing the right dream in the wrong way. You, too, have a beautiful voice inside you. You just have to find it and set it free.

This is my 100th blog post. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for hearing my voice.

This is also a Bigger Picture moment.

Share with us today at Brook's place.

7 comments:

  1. You sing just like your mama. We may not be able to sing but we do so many other great things. We both make beautiful people. You're my proof and Reese is yours. If everyone could sing, the world might still be in trouble. But if everyone could make great people, the world would be such a better place. Keep up the good work baby! Love you!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, sweetie Congrats!!! And I'm so happy that you found your voice. I know my blog did the same for me. Sing loud and proud from the highest rooftop, we are here listening.

    BTW - My son's tell me to stop singing too, and dancing...jeez.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes! I, for one, enjoy listening to your voice!! And, it's interesting. I was pushed to sing/perform as a kid and a young adult. And, in spite of the fact that other people wanted me to use my voice that way...and in many ways since then...finding MY voice has taken (is taking!?!) years. And, so far, feels the most authentic through my little nook of the blogsosphere! Love this post!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Congratulations on 100 posts!!! So happy to have met you here :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. What a wonderful perspective! Love this post; it is an absolutely perfect way to celebrate 100 posts and counting!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You do! You do! Your voice is lovely and it resonates and blesses. I love that He gave you your dream even if it wasn't in the way you would have expected.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Glad you found your way to sing - and am grateful you're sharing your beautiful voice!

    ReplyDelete