Saturday, April 2, 2011

Love Notes

I am married to the greatest man alive and let me tell you why. He makes me laugh. He makes me feel safe. He respects me. He works hard. He forgives me when I make mistakes. He holds me when I'm sad. He makes me happy. He makes me a better person. He loves his family. He tells me I'm beautiful. I can talk to him about anything. He cares about my opinion. He's a great dad. He's honest with me. He's faithful to me. He would do anything for me. He stands up for me. He prays with me. He's my best friend. And he's everything I've ever wanted in a man.

That was 20 of the 101 reasons I love my husband. I made a list of 101 things I love about Matt not only to prove that I really do think I'm married to the greatest man alive, but also as a reminder to myself on days when I forget. After we got married I couldn't believe how quickly our relationship hit a level of comfort that easily gets taken for granted. I am shocked at how often I have forgotten how lucky I am and how often I have chosen words fueled by anger over words fueled by love and respect. I understand now why so many new marriages fail. When you're young and in love you think your relationship is immune to fights and disrespecful words and thoughts of divorce. Every couple needs to take the time and effort to safeguard their relationships against these things because if it hasn't happened to you yet, it will. I have found that my approach to our relationship is much different on the days when I take a moment to think back to when we first met; back to the reasons I first fell in love with him; back to the day I stood in front of God and promised to love, honor, and cherish him for better or worse for the rest of my life.

I encourage every woman to do this. Seriously, I want you to take some time to write something nice about your husband (and your husband should do it for you too). Write about what attracted you to him, why you fell in love, what you felt on your wedding day, or why you miss him when you're apart. Make a list, write a poem, draw a diagram. It doesn't matter. Just put something on paper. Then take your little love note and tuck it in a safe place. Read it to yourself when you are mad at him or when he makes a mistake. Before you get upset about one thing he did wrong, think first about the many things he does right. Before you react to how he made you mad today, think first about how he makes you happy every other day. Before you get carried away in a moment of anger, first get carried away in a moment of love. Instead of thinking, "He's so aggravating. He does X, Y, and Z, and he never does this and he always does that," just get out your love note and start with, "I am married to the greatest man alive..." and then see if anything else matters.

2 comments:

  1. I want to thank you for this post. I randomly came across it JUST yesterday and read it. I loved it and your words really hit home and repeated in my head through out the day.
    When I came home last night my husband quite upset me over something that he does all the time (you know those moments?) and while we did start a small argument over it, once I had 10 minutes to myself to think about it and register I all of a sudden said to myself "He wasn't feeling good today, but still went out and got you grapefruit" such a silly, small thing BUT it was something he didn't need to do and what a WOW moment that was. I apologized immediately and he was apologetic for what happened as well. And it was done just like that!
    Not that you need to know my life story but thanks SO much for this post :o)

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  2. Thank you so much for your comment! I'm so honored to have you reading. Thank you also for sharing your personal connection to this post. Isn't funny how we love our spouses so much but so easily forget about all of that when we get caught up in our daily lives? Sounds like you have a great husband too. How lucky we are!

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