There is a Boss

I recently sat through a workshop on discipline where the speaker said that when you discipline a toddler you are mainly trying to teach one simple concept: "there is a boss and it's not you." Now, say what you will about that philosophy. I didn't bring it up to agree or disagree. I brought it up because I feel it's a worthwhile message for us adults too.

Oh, how difficult it is to give up control in our lives... especially for a Type A (or Type Triple A) person like me. I need to have everything under control at all times. My least favorite word is "uncertainty." Every day has a plan, and a plan for how to approach the plan, and a plan B in case plan A goes awry. As I get more and more caught up in making my plans, I start to slip into a mindset where I demand more and more control over the big picture of my life. I want everything to work out my way. I want the outcomes that best serve me and my circumstances. I want to be the boss of my life!

Our parents disciplined us as kids because they knew more about immediate dangers and long-term consequences than we did. Sticking a fork in the outlet seems like a lot of fun to a toddler. How disappointing must it be as the fork gets ripped from his little hand? Eating ice cream for every meal seems awesome to a kid. How much must it stink to have to eat broccoli instead? But as their parents, we know that we have to protect them from the short-term hazards and prepare them for long-term health and success. And so the same goes for us as adults and the "forks" that God rips away from us before we get hurt, or the "broccoli" He forces us to eat that ultimately makes us strong, better people. So when things work out in a way that doesn't quite jive with my plans, I'm trying to remember that "there is a boss and it's not me."